Do you know why some people don’t like your hair??

Hey guys , how are you all today? Recently, I’ve been putting up new posts every 2weeks and I kind of miss weekly blog posts. I miss the excitement of posting weekly and reading your comments. I hope you are well my dear readers 🙂

This week, let’s talk about why some people don’t like your hair! I bet you’re wondering, what’s wrong with my hair?? There was a conversation between the girls last week that went thus:

Baby T to her sister: I don’t like your hair

Princess T: Daddy, my sister said she doesn’t like my hair

Dr O: Your hair is lovely , it doesn’t matter if she likes it or not as long as you do

I overheard this conversation and asked Baby T why she didn’t like her sister’s hair. It turns out her sister had a bow in her hair she liked and wanted , so instead of admitting to that feeling, she said her hair wasn’t nice instead.

I’m sure you have a good idea where I’m going with this.

The reason some people don’t like you or what you do is not because there’s anything wrong with you or what you do, it is just because they want what you have.

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Photo Credit: Freepik

Now, I’m not asking we all become cynical or paranoid but we need to be careful and cautious about whose advise we are taking. Imagine taking your hair out because someone doesn’t like it only to find out it is because they want it.

  • Jealousy is human

I am a human being, nothing human can be alien to me

Maya Angelou

Jealousy and envy are emotions that are human and anything human shouldn’t be alien to us, it exists, we are wise to accept it.

This is the reason some people tell you what they do but this post isn’t about jealousy (we will talk about that soon), it is about choosing whose voice you listen to.

The aim is also not for you to discard good counsel as in life, we sometimes need to be told the very hard and painful truth sometimes.

  • Some people don’t even like themselves

Believe it or not, a lot of people don’t like themselves. You would know by how they treat themselves, the decisions they make and how they treat others.

How do you expect a person who doesn’t like himself to like you? We are just not capable of giving what we don’t have. Remember misery loves company.

So the next time a colleague, friend or relative says something unpleasant to you or even gives you harsh advice, look beneath the surface.
How do they even treat themselves?

Do not expect a person who isn’t kind to themselves to be kind to you.

Photo Credit: Freepik
  • Do you like yourself?

To be honest, this is a whole topic on its own but I will brush over it. Few weeks ago in church, the minister was talking about a horrible statement someone said to a friend.

Everyone gasped and then he said “actually, it was her inner voice saying that to her?”

Of all the liars in the world, sometimes the worst are our own fears.

Rudyard Kipling, The Collected Works

What are you saying to yourself? Are you as kind and gentle with yourself as you’d be with the best friend you absolutely love? You are the only one that can answer this question.

  • Who are you listening to?

I’m not sure I’ve cracked this myself and I’m open to learning from you dear readers. I’ve realised I seek advice from different people for different things.

So for instance, I can take advice from a friend about kids and not be able to take financial advice from the same person. I tend to focus on people’s area of strength.

But most importantly, I advise not going to everyone or anyone for important advice about your life.

I mean , if you’re looking to change your car or sofa, anyone can give you advice but when it comes to life changing decisions, choose wisely.

Photo Credit: Freepik

Thankfully, God has blessed me with good mentors to guide me. This is something I prayed for a long time ago and God opened my eyes to see the people He has put in my life for different reasons.

I would advice same really, if you desire mentors, ask God. There is a reason Elisha had Elijah and even Jesus had disciples.

  • Have you asked the Holy Spirit?

Recently, I had an idea and questions about it and found myself calling a few friends to share which was absolutely fine as these people have known me for a long time and have insight into the situation.

One day, I heard within me ‘have you even asked the Holy Spirit before asking everyone else’? You can imagine that made me a pull a seat to think again.

So I will ask you this same question; ‘Before you ask others for advice, have you asked the wisest one who is in you and the greatest counsellor?’

Every time I do this sincerely, the answer comes in different ways, infact, sometimes He prompts me to speak with a particular person. He is in us to guide us, let us take advantage of that guidance.

I’m looking forward to all your wise comments , opinion and questions. Don’t forget to share with your family and friends.

I leave you with the peace of God!

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Yinka A

This is true. People’s opinions should not change who we really are.


A lot to unpack, think this could have been 3 posts sef haha.

What I take from this is actually the fact that there can be multiple answers or perspectives to the exact same question/feeling.

1. Love yourself:
The most important person in our lives besides God should be us. If we don’t love ourselves or take care of ourselves l, we may not be able to love and take care of others.
However, there are a lot of people that thrive on putting others first, and it’s important for those people to remember to take care of Number 1.

2. You can’t control how people feel:
As long as you are at peace with yourself and you treat people they way you expect to be treated, don’t let others comments or feelings change you. Advice and constructive criticism is important to shape us to be the best version of ourselves but the ultimate goal is to be at peace.

3. Be care what advice you take in.
I like the bit that talks about how you can take advice from someone about one thing bit not another. It’s like choosing a bank or loan, always look for the strongest structure. Even if not all doctors were A students, you would not want your surgeon to tell you he barely passed med school.

And as the author suggests, never underestimate the ultimate advisor in all things

Amina Ibrahim

There’s a lot to take from this post, but first thank you for the wisdom you put out.
Some of us have long put people’s opinions above ours especially over matters that concerns us, this truly isn’t the way to live and be free.
Reason being that, one will always seek validation from people who do not matter in the grand scheme of things.
Ask yourself this, if it all comes down to one person, who then, is THAT PERSON? The answer you give should be a guiding light – I hope.

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