Can we talk about the elephant in the room? Part 2

Hello beautiful people! How has your week been? It’s another weekend and I’m grateful, all I plan to do is centred around rest.

Last week, we had a very engaging conversation (which I liked) about social media use and its impact, I promised to continue that discussion this week by sharing the tips I’ve tried to manage my phone/devices use.  If you missed that post, please click here because you need to read it. Did you check your average screen time on your phone as I advised?

Firstly, let me put a disclaimer out there- I don’t do all of this but I’ve tried them at different times and found them useful. I’m not perfect with my devices so don’t get it twisted but I try.

Photo Credit: Pinterest
  • What are you doing to yourself?

I have started to ask myself really hard questions and I kindly request you ask yourself the same. Whoever /whatever you expose yourself to on social media is ‘what you are doing to yourself’

There is a lot of information out there that you really have no business with. Do you remember our post on guarding your mind? Don’t joke with it, re –evaluate the people you expose yourself to their content.

  • Schedule social media time

Personally, I realise I get distracted with apps if I have my phone with me, it’s constantly as though the phone is crying “pick me, pick me”…hahahha!  Blame it on my  lack of self control, I usually delete social media apps off my phone and download them (just one click of a button) when I have some downtime, I catch up and delete it again when I’m done till next time.

On the first day of anatomy in medical school, the lecturer told us a popular  quote which I have found useful in life:

Man know thyself 

What works for one might not necessarily work for another

  • Turn off your phone and connect with yourself/others

I think I started taking my downtime seriously about 2/3years ago, I don’t know how I ever survived without it before then (probably explains some of the stupid things I did).

Daily, I schedule time maybe 2 or 3hours mostly in the evening when I turn off my phone and just connect with my family. It completely removes the distraction of ‘an important phone call ‘ or idle chit-chats.

I’m one of those people that ‘go to bed’, my friends have teased me about this since medical school. I can never fall asleep on the sofa, I decide its bed time, perform whatever bed time ritual I need to do and get into bed, I then spend some time alone with my thoughts (and God) before falling asleep and I do this on most nights (except when I’m at work).

My phone is either on silent mode when I sleep or turned off. When I tell people this, they ask “what if there’s an emergency?” and my answer is always, “In the last two years, how many phone calls have you gotten at 2am that was an emergency and you were able to help?’’

Even if you are a company CEO, what changes can you make after midnight? You need to love yourself enough to allow yourself rest.

  • Keep your phone/device far from you (and teach the kids to do same)

I find it rude when I’m with friends and they’re continuously on the phone so I try not to do it myself. Occasionally, I pick up my phone to respond to a message but that’s it and thankfully my close friends don’t do that either.

To keep myself in check, I put my phone far from me when spending time with my family or friends or working on anything important, including my reading time. I learnt this from one of my close friends, she leaves her phone upstairs when she’s spending time with people.

  • Is your business/job on your phone?

I can only imagine how tricky it is for people who do business with/on social media. I don’t have experience in this, other than this blog’s social media accounts which honestly I hired someone to manage. I would suggest having working hours so you’re not attached to your device 24hours a day.

Active doesn’t always mean effective and being busy all the time does not mean you’re productive. You might want to audit your time and see what hours you actually speak with clients to manage your time better.

Photo Credit: Pinterest
  • Kids screen time

We already established last week that our kids will pick up a lot of our habits. Personally, I find giving the kids their tablet so convenient when I want a break (we are all guilty) but all things must be done in moderation.

Kids are now glued to screens even at home, it’s so disturbing.  It is not easy but it’s a decision we have to make and we might fail on some days but that’s ok. Schedule screen time for the kids.

  • Someone said ‘body image’

Last week, one of our readers left a comment about children and body image. I intend to write a post about this soon so I won’t delve in deeply this time.

I work in the emergency department and you would be surprised if I told you the number of kids and teenagers I see weekly with suicidal attempts and mental health problems directly linked to social media and body image issues.

I once saw a girl who was severely anorexic and when asked how it started ‘Her grandma had jokingly called her fat when she was 9’. I want you to know and be aware as a parent, there is a lot of work for us to do, we really can’t be slacking on ourselves talk less of the kids. I once talked about ‘The Power of a Praying Parent’ by Stormie Omartian, there is  a chapter that focuses on praying for our kids and their body image. I recommend that book again and again.

  • Again, turn off your phone and connect with God

Some of my close friends have learnt this trick of turning off your phone from me and they love it. At least one day a week (mostly weekend or a day I’m home), my phone is off the entire day, it helps me disconnect from the noise of the world and I spend my time just focusing on God and whatever other productive activities I want to engage in.

This is what a lot of Christians call a ‘retreat’. I don’t give it any name, I just call it my downtime and its effective. A few times, I’ve done it for a week or more, only informing family and close friends ahead of that so they’re not worried. I won’t advise you to start with a week, but try it for a few hours first and then maybe a day. I’ve never heard someone give a bad feedback about it.

So again, I leave you with the peace of God this week. I shall be expecting feedback! If you’re not subscribed, please subscribe below and as always, thank you all for sharing the blog!

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Thank you Ma for part 2.

What I do with my kids. For my daughter (4yrs) I leave her to play on her iPad immediately it runs out of battery that’s it for at least 3hrs I join her we do some school work, some chores.
For my son (11yrs) after his remote learning at 3pm I tell him to put his gadgets on charge no touching them until 6pm. Those 3 hours he will go for his 1mile walk, do chores, bath help the sister with any assignment sent from school. Basically I tell him to make himself busy.

It’s helping it’s now 3 months we are practicing


As for me 😂🤣🤣it has been so hard until I decided to go to rehab (that’s how I called it).

I decided to set alarm on my phone immediately that alarm goes on I put my phone on charge for 2hrs make myself busy. I make sure I find something to do around the house.

My businesses are all on my phone but I always tell my clients to send me messages if they need me for that I can answer but calling I don’t pick when am in the rehab.

I have also started leaving my phone upstairs after 7pm so that I have my own time. My own time is when I think about my tomorrow and my kids, that’s when I do some reading , connect with God.

I don’t switch off my phone but put it on silence.

I thank God rehab is helping bse I was really getting addicted

Aderonke Oshungbohun

Hahahaa….I need to go to phone rehab myself! I will try out your method!

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